When GoodReads Hates The Book You Never Wrote

Everyone remember JANE'S SHADOW? For a hot minute that was the working title of CONVERGENCE POINT. The preview went up on GoodReads the same time that THE DAY BEFORE was published and was never removed. I've been told it can't be removed, although I've sent a note to GoodReads to see the Ghost of Titles Past can be exorcised.

In the meantime, it's fun to note that someone is either furious that JANE'S SHADOW is not a real title, or they enjoy maliciously leaving reviews on GoodReads. Either way, a user named L went so far as to review a book that doesn't exist and leave one star for my nonexistent novel.

*sad trombone noises*

One-star reviews on GoodReads are usually notable for their hilarity ("The book is short!" on a free book labeled microfiction). This one is no exception.

I'm dying of curiosity here.

Did L read the rough draft and hate the book?

Is L angry that the book wasn't published under this title?

Does L hate the title?

It's laughable to suggest that L hates me, except that L has been storming around GoodReads leaving 1-star reviews for other authors. So maybe L just hates books?

Is L mad at me for sharing an initial?

The world may never know.

Soon the listing for The Book That Never Was will vanish along with L and the Curious Incident of the L Reviews. If it doesn't, who knows, maybe I'll try to write a story to L's demanding standards. Something that with mixed up tenses, head hopping, and name changing characters. Something worthy of the 1-star review.

I don't know, it kind of sounds like a fun project for a rainy day. To write the worst book in the English language, to garner nothing but 1-star reviews, to aim to be horribly, irretrievably bad!

Although there is Clippy the Word Helper erotica (save yourself! Don't google this!), so the bar for bad is set pretty low.

All The News About Reviews

 From the inbox...

"Liana,

    I heard about the thing where Amazon is suing people for fake reviews. My question is: why would anyone pay for reviews? You either know your book sucks or it doesn't. Do authors really need to pay someone to stroke their ego and praise their book?

- Confused"

¸.·´¯`·.´¯`·.¸¸.·´¯`·.¸><(((º>

Dear Confused,

    

I imagine there would be a healthy market for professional cheerleaders for authors. Self-esteem gets hit hard when you're in publishing, but that's not why people buy reviews. People buy reviews to sell books.

It sounds weird. Especially when you look at the Fiverr case where authors were paying people to buy the book and leave a review. It seems like it would have been smarter for the author to buy 100 copies of their own book and sell them at the Farmer's Market for cash, right?

But it all comes back to Amazon algorithms.

If you've ever shopped on Amazon you've probably noticed there's a nifty list of things other people bought when they bought the item you're looking at. Whether you're shopping for Barbie videos or the newest EL James novel or vintage Harry Potter gear there's always a suggestion for other things you might like. 

That very sneaky advertising relies on a couple of factors: your buying history, prices, the buying history of other customers, and reviews. And when it comes to books, the reviews are very heavily weighted.

They don't even need to be good reviews! A hundred one-star reviews reading, "This book was written by a concussed vole with questionable taste in men!" will still get more attention from the sales algorithms than the book with three five-star reviews, even if those five-star reviews come from Stephen Spielberg, Neil Gaiman, Michelle Obama, Pope Francis, and the Duchess of Cambridge. 

Because what Amazon sees is 100 sales vs 5 sales. The computer program looks at the spreadsheet and says, "This book by Concussed Vole is selling like hotcakes for 99 cents and we make 50 cents per sale! And this book by Truly Perfect Author is selling for $7.99 and not doing anything. Put all the advertising into Concussed Vole sales!"

It's the smart bet.

Amazon would rather rake in the pennies from the hate-sales (books sold just because no one can believe it is truly that awful) than waste advertising space on a good product that has poor sales.

And what do you think happens when Amazon pushes Concussed Vole's book to the front page? That's right, it has even more sales!

When authors buy reviews they are trying to game the system. They're trying to trick Amazon's advertising program into giving them attention and free press. 

Understandably, Amazon (and other - more honest - authors) get a little bit upset about the fact that someone is trying to turn publishing into a pay-to-play situation. And while it's true Amazon is doing this all to make a hefty profit with little overhead it is still unethical on the part of the author.

I've seen authors offer free copies of books for honest reviews. In some genres that's practically required. The ebook boom led to a review boom. People who couldn't otherwise afford books are now turning away authors because they don't have enough time to read and review every book put out there. 

Other authors, daunted by the ordeal of getting honest reviews, try less scrupulous methods: paid reviews, sock-puppet accounts, bribing friends and family, or Fiverr. 

I've yet to meet anyone in my circle of friends who's admitted to buying reviews. I know of a few "celebrity" authors who bought 1000 copies of their book to boost sales data (*ahem* some politician *ahem*) but at the end of the day the boost is artificial and won't last. 

Real reviews come from fans who are invested enough to give up their time not just to read, but to comment. Those are the fans that want to interact with the author, and those are the fans that will share the books they love with others. The fans who leave reviews become part of the 1000 True Fans every author is looking for. 

TL;DR - Buying reviews is about boosting sales ranks on Amazon, not about stroking the ego. If you love a book, please leave a reviews. REVIEWS SELL BOOKS. 

If You Leave A One Star Review...

... on a book that is not published I expect blow-by-blow details of what went wrong so I can fix the book before publication.

You, the reader, hereby agree to this contract by reading any words in the English language.

I think it's only fair. Especially since JANE'S SHADOW (the second book in the Jane series) is now listed on GoodReads. I'm waiting for someone to leave a starred review of the book. Anticipating it even. Because as soon as they do I'm going to pounce and demand to see a final copy.

Because, as you must have suspected all along, JANE'S SHADOW is still a draft on my computer. It's not even a mature draft. It's a few chapters, a wavering outline, and an ending.

But, hey, I'm a fair person. If you have a copy of my finished novel from the future and you don't like it, send me a detailed note! I'll try to get this fixed before the actual release date. What more can I do?

Also, if you want to mark JANE'S SHADOW as Want To Read on GoodReads I wouldn't mind that at all.  

Have a great weekend, my lovelies! Take care of yourselves and I'll see you all again on Monday.

:)
- Liana

Love, Lust, and Lipstick Stains Read of the Week!

Guess which book Love, Lust, and Lipstick Stains Reviews fell in love with this week? That's right! Heroes and Villains Book 2 - EVEN VILLAINS GO TO THE MOVIES!

Angela Smith has superpowers—nothing that will ever make her comic-book famous—but her ability to psychically sense and manipulate the emotions of people around her has drawn unwanted government attention. Forced to choose between her quiet life as a teacher under constant surveillance or the life of a rogue, she chooses the latter. She plans to hide out in sunny Los Angeles where being a blue-eyed blonde won’t make anyone bat a false eyelash.

Silver screen star by day, superhero by night, Arktos is a triple-threat. He can fly, freeze anything, and see glimpses of the future, all of which he needs to keep the city of Los Angeles safe, but which does nothing for his social life. When a frightening vision of an explosion leads him to rescue a damsel in distress, he finds himself trading Shakespearean insults with a rogue.

Angela knows just how dangerous well-intentioned superheroes can be: one tried to kill her family when she was young. Arktos knows he should hand the rogue over to Company justice; it’s not safe for someone like her to be in the middle of a fight.

But they can’t seem to stay apart. And together, they just might be able to melt all the obstacles standing between true love for a hero and a villain.

Choosing between good and evil has never been this much fun.

Breathless Press | Amazon | Barnes and Noble | Kobo | Smashwords | Bookstrand | ARe | GoodReads

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And Night Owl Romance Reviews has been seduced by TALES FROM THE SFR BRIGADE. Check out this glowing review of the free anthology! 

If you haven't picked up TALES FROM THE SFR BRIGADE yet I suggest you go download it now. You deserve a good book, and it's free! 

The Inevitable Troll Attraction

Where do trolls come from? Do they spawn under bridges, the horrible result of water pollution and sentient rats? Are they descendants of Big Foot dressed up and given keyboards? Or are there really people out there who think their life will be improved by advertising their tobacco product in my blog comments?

I'm leaning towards the Big Foot theory myself. It's terrible to think that a human being is out there spending their day trolling and spamming blogs for fun and profit.

Alas, the trolls exist, and to cut down on the spam comments I am turning off Anonymous commenting. Open ID should be in effect now, and I'm sorry. I know not everyone has an OpenID account (FaceBook, Twitter, Google, ect) and that's going to limit you. I will turn that off the next time I hold a contest. If you run into problems, I'm on Twitter @LianaBrooks.

One more thing... I DON'T DO REVIEWS!

I know I've done some in the past, but that's closed now. My review policy is listed right beside my email address on the right side of the blog (under the big Email Me button). Please, don't send me a copy of your book and ask me to review it. Don't email me telling me you'll send me a PDF so I can review. Really don't demand I review it. Chances are, I'll read your book if I know you've written one in the sci-fi genre. I'll get to it eventually. If I adore it, I'll tell people about it on Twitter and GoodReads. Promise.

Now, I'm going back to my writing cave because I need to get a short story to Pippa Jay by Wednesday and I'm still 7k behind quota. *everyone panic with me*