Motherhood

Mother's Day.... flowers, guilt, and burnt toast are all on the horizon. This year is also the 50th anniversary of The Pill. What an ironic combination.

Society has this weird view of motherhood. Half the people out there think it's this fabulous miracle of life and the future of our species (they may have a point there - just saying), the other half think motherhood is some demonic form of parochial control that ought to be shunned by every right thinking woman.

Coming from a strictly evolutionary perspective, I encourage both sides indiscriminately. People who want to raise the next generation as socially aware, caring, thinking individuals should be encouraged. And people who want the entire species to go extinct should be weeded out of the gene pool as fast as possible.

People who think men are in charge, or should be, need therapy. :o) (I love guys, honest. That doesn't mean I'll let DH run the checkbook, or plan out the month's schedule.)

That's my daughter in the picture, so you can guess which side of the fracas I'm naturally sympathetic with. As with politics, I take a moderate view. I think both sides are right, to a point.

Motherhood and marriage aren't shameful. Being a single woman, or a career woman, or a happily copulating but not cross-pollinating woman isn't shameful either. I'll spare you the rant, and pass out the clue-by-fours. If you run into a zealot on either side feel free to smack them, tell them Liana sent you.

Meanwhile, here's a shout out to some people who give Mother's Day meaning for me!

My mother is amazing. She's doing chemo again this year. She's had cancer for over half my life. You'd never know it from talking to her. She's a survivor. She lives her life, and lets the cancer wither and die. She's college educated, a microbiologist, and an artist. She's sent three children to college, and stayed sane. She deserves to be celebrated without reservation.

My grandmother is amazing. She's a survivor too. In her case, it was Nazis, not cancer. Out of a family with seven children, she's the only one who survived to old age. We don't know where her parents are buried. She speaks five languages fluently, reads and writes in three, and has traveled through most the world. She's held numerous careers, remade herself time and again, and at age 77 swims five miles every morning, runs three miles, and volunteers at a local homeless shelter. She deserves to be celebrated.

My Mother-in-Law is amazing. She's traveled all over the world as a navy brat and settled down in a tiny town in northern New York that no one can spell without a reference. She's intelligent, thoughtful, and organized. She raised three wonderful children. She gave my husband the firm grounding he needed to succeed in everything he does. She's level-headed, good in an emergency, and a fabulous person to talk to. She deserves to be celebrated.

My children are amazing. I have three very unique little individuals running through my house during the day. They each have their own personality, their own talents, and their own trials. They're intelligent and thoughtful. They will change the world. Maybe only in small ways, but they will change the world. They deserve to be celebrated. Without them I wouldn't get to have half the fun I do, or half the inspiration. Their crazy games have spawned more than one plot.


P.S. The burnt toast and guilt aren't mine. Everyone over age five in this house can make a credible meal of one form or another (although Small and Pink only does yogurt and Ramon noodles at this stage).

I have no guilt lingering over me like a black rain-cloud. I think my children are healthy, happy, and well-adjusted as they are ever going to be with geeks for parents. They may be slightly better educated than the average child in this area, but not to any extreme.

I'm also pretty sure there are no flowers for Mother's Day this year. DH learned early in our relationship that buying me flower seeds was a much better investment than buying me dead foliage. It's cheaper, and it lasts longer. But I am getting a nice dinner and a present of some kind. Happy Mother's Day!