Do you know what I did yesterday? I wrote synopsis! My very first synopsis!I've had physics tests that were easier than condensing 25,000 words into four pages. I have to drop it down to a cool 1000 words still, but at least I have the first draft!
Of course, this means I'm getting ready to kick one of my fledgling stories out of the nest. No synopsis is complete without the query letter to go with. That means I need you to rip, shred, and otherwise comment on my query.
Are you ready? Do you have your red ink pens? Steel-toed boots? Editor's hat on?
Decimate this:
Super villain Evan Smith, aka Doctor Charm, is planning to rig the 2012 presidential elections in the United States to gain world power when his wife, Tabitha, announces that she will return to work as the superhero Zephyr Girl. For the past seven years Evan has used his secret Morality Machine to make Tabitha see past her black and white superhero morals and love him.
When Tabitha back at work Evan is left trying to find a way to entertain their four daughters in his lab. While he calibrates the Election Machine the girls break the Morality Machine.
Although he originally planned the machine to slowly turn off once Tabitha loved him, he isn’t sure that she can love him without its influence. When his worst fears come true and Tabitha walks out Evan will have to use all his villainous skills to win her back for good.
"For the past seven years super villain Evan Smith has used his secret Morality Machine to make his wife Tabitha, the superhero Zephyr Girl, see past her black and white morals and love him.
ReplyDeleteBut when their darling daughters break the Morality Machine, Evan isn't sure his wife can love him without its influence.
When his worst fears come true and Tabitha walks out Evan will have to use all his villainous skills to win her back for good."
The election info is good to know, but just a subplot, not really central to the story. You want to focus on E & T's relationship, which is the core of your novella.
Just my opinion. feel free to take some, all of it or ignore it completely. :D
@wrytersblockDH - put well! (grammatically well put); I also prefer leading with the relationship.
ReplyDeleteMaybe the election bit could come at the end (i.e. what he plans to do about it)
Couple nits:
"Super villain Evan Smith, aka Doctor Charm, [plans] to rig the 2012 presidential elections [-delete-][. H]is wife..."
"[With] Tabatha back at work"